Tea and Sympathy

To Mute Troubadour, whose church, in his own words, just shot itself. It saddens me greatly, but I cease to be surprised at the verbal violence that can go on inside the body of Christ. As a boy, my father was first an elder, than the pastoring elder of the small, non-denominational fellowship in which I grew up. As the church shrunk due to general lethargy and attrition, parishioners became bitter, and pastors are usually the first to be seen with a bulls-eye painted on their back. My father was no exception, and as the church groaned at its latter end, he was ripped up and down for offenses real and imagined by church members and ex-members. The member who hosted the meetings - which had been intended to air out the problems and save the church - regretted afterward that the two meetings had even been allowed to take place in his living room. I was too young to go, but I remember my parents coming home late at night: my mother crying and my father absolutely silent. From her account years later, he was similarly silent at the meetings, saying nothing at all in his own defense.

A number of people were completely in denial about the 18-year old church ending and wanted it to continue. Even after all the vitriol, my father offered to remain with the church for another six months in an advisory role to anyone who wanted to step into the pastorship. Nobody did.

For 5 years we "sojourned", never committing to a church, though I personally got involved in two churches much more than my family. One of those churches split 2 years ago in what was essentially a power-play by one of the pastors to oust the other. My family joined the newly split off church, which has been really blessed and a lot more humble these past 2 years, since they really felt they could relate. However, I don't know if my father will ever be willing to become involved in more than Sunday services in any church, let alone take a leadership role, after being suffering the worst personal assault of his life at the hands of people in whom he had invested 10 years of his life. I don't blame him.

All that to say, my sympathy and prayers go out to the Broken-Hearted Troubadour. And yes, Doug, God's heart breaks too.