Kerry

I openly mocked Kerry tonight in front of my class. Is that wrong?

On the other hand, he is quite a pleasant zombie from the 1960's without a real platform except that his initials are JFK and his running mate when he held executive office was from Brookline, same as the real JFK, and the only JFK who will win ever a Democratic nomination for President.

Dean's done for. He'll stay in the race for a while, with his decent 2nd place showing (expectations totally changed; if this result had come up without the Iowa precursor, it would have sunk Dean under about 6 feet of genuine Granite), but he's not a serious candidate at this point. Kerry has no chance in South Carolina, and as soon as the other candidates turn their guns on him, he'll be crushed everywhere westawusta.

In other news, Dr. Howard Dean was called upon to use his skills as a physician. Specifically, he was asked to certify that the cadaver found under a bridge in Derry indeed belonged to the Campaign to Elect Joe Lieberman. Dean did a quick autopsy, and found that not only was the body certifiably dead, but it had in fact never actually been alive. Li'l Joe could not be reached for comment.